All of us know how babies are made, and know that the basic process is quite opposite of a stressful experience. In my eyes, it should be simple and easy. Growing up, I remember taking health classes and sex education classes beginning in 5th grade. When you’re taught that your body is naturally made to conceive, you don’t need to take the time or do the research to really understand every process your body goes through to do so…unless conception becomes a struggle, of course.
That’s the stressful part; the struggle.
There are so many people out there that are quick to provide the advice of “don’t stress,” “don’t try so hard,” or “just have fun with it.” If you are one of those people providing that advice, or know someone who is, or has experienced that type of advice, check out my previous post HERE. Most of these people haven’t been in my shoes, or your shoes when it comes to struggling with conception, so they just don’t get it…and that’s okay! I don’t expect people to “get it.” I just want people to understand where I am coming from.
When you begin to experience negative pregnancy test after negative pregnancy test, you are willing to do anything and everything in your power to conceive; this process consumes your mind. When my husband and I weren’t having much luck in the beginning, I began following every step my app provided me as well as logging as much information as possible. This included BBT (basal body temperature), all details about menstruation, sex (when, where, how…etc), physical symptoms, amount and texture of CM (cervical mucus), ovulation test results, pregnancy test results, sleep duration, stress level, mood and physical symptoms. I was even changing my diet and exercise routine. Literally, my life was consumed and I was stressing myself out without knowing it.
I had so many questions: When do I ovulate? How do I know if I am ovulating? How long do I ovulate for? Is there a certain position I need to stay in “after the deed?” Is it better to try daily or every other day? What is the best way to “fight gravity?” Seriously…I could go on and on.
I feel like as soon as you begin to stress about trying not to stress, something is wrong. Am I right?! But it is SO EASY to let yourself get consumed in all of this. Although it’s a “natural process” for your body to take, things get a little more unnatural as you begin to struggle. The best thing I did to stop all of this nonsense was talk with my doctor. STOP GOOGLE-ING! Seriously, though. There is so much nonsense on the internet that almost everything I googled and repeated to my doctor was wrong, ha! I got the best information from my doctor and from the GLOW app (highly recommend this app if you are TTC or even just trying to track your cycle). After talking with my doctor and getting cleared through fertility testing, I got pregnant (although it was an ectopic pregnancy, it was still a pregnancy)!
So, what’s my plan this time around?
Eliminate as many stressors as possible.
I’ve been using the Ava Bracelet when I go to sleep every night. This helps track all that crazy stuff relating to your cycle, ovulation, and pregnancy without any work on my end. It tracks resting pulse rate, skin temperature, breathing rate, stress level, and sleep. It also allows you to record other data if you’d like. All of those variables the Ava Bracelet records during your sleep are scientifically based to provide you insight and information about conception. Most of my stress is gone.
I don’t have to battle the thermometer the second I open my eyes for my BBT.
I don’t have to worry about entering in my data the moment I notice something different.
I don’t have to guess when I am ovulating or spend money on ovulation tests; it may even save me money on pregnancy tests this time around!
Obviously your situation is not the same as mine. We may have different issues with our bodies that are causing our TTC journey to be difficult, which means different stressors. One thing that can be the same between us is that we will never give up. If we want to be moms, we will one day. I am going into this next round of TTC with a positive attitude, refreshed mind, and less stress. Find what works for you to eliminate some stressors- and PLEASE share! It may help someone else, too!